Sign here.Please. Thank You.

Today I went searching for a specific photo of a beautiful painted Kashub barn in Wilno, Ontario because I had taken it, and thought it would be appropriate to do a blog on the first  Polish settlement in Canada, given the recent tragic death of Poland's president.
I couldn't find that particular file. Not on this netbook, not on the laptop, and definitely not on the antiquated monster that lurks downstairs! God only knows what part of the universe that file now inhabits and He's not telling.
So, I'm sorry and I do extend my sincere condolances to any Polish readers. I will take another trip to Wilno and take some more pictures and share them soon.
BUT! In my search, I did come across a file called Signage. And so I will share some of its contents with you, gentle reader.
We Canadians have earned our reputation for being polite and rather retiring. Perhaps it's the United Empire Loyalist legacy, or the cultural mosaic model of the 60's Trudeau era.(Place for everyone, everyone in his place). Whatever the reason, we really do say "Sorry!" when someone bumps into us, causing us to trip and fall. We apologize when we disagree, as in, " I'm sorry, Mr. Bell Telephone, but I really don't think my bill should be $3 trillion dollars, because I've been very ill, and my phone has been turned off this past month. Would it be possible, pretty please, for you, or someone to check on that and let me know sometime? Of course, I'll pay the bill, but if you would just, well, look into it, that would be really nice!"

"What's that? It's not Bell's fault? Oh. Oh. Well then. Ok, sorry to bother you! And, uh, please, yes, do put me on the I Accept Telemarketing Calls list! "
As a nation, we could use a course in assertiveness training.
Which is why, when these signs were noticed on a recent trip south, I truly found them shocking!! I've travelled many times to the States, and I'm a huge fan, but this was the first time I became aware of some of the signs, and
the guts, the gall, the oh gawd of these signs...

The American constitution guarantees the right to bear arms. The Canadian constitution guarantees the right to peace and good government. 
That's a significant difference in upbringing methinks.
When I first saw this sign, I thought it was a college student, jokey sign...for about 30 seconds, and then I realized it wasn't a joke at all!
Holy Gunsmoke, Roy! Take your finger offa Trigger! 
Not long after this shot (sic) was taken, we were in a grocery store and the man in the cashier's line ahead of me had a gun -in a holster, on a belt.
That was an absolute first for me, outside of the movies.
I was stunned, and started giggling, because it felt  so scary. That "Oh My God, I don't know what to do, I'm so out of my league, I can't  do anything but laugh", laugh. Perhaps some of you are used to scenes like this.
I definitely am not.
The next sign isn't as frightening...quite...

It's politely asking the reader to keep his or her clothes on, refrain from having sex in public, and for goodness sake, don't swear. Alrighty then. I don't plan to do any of those things today, in front of this sign...but I do have to wonder just what rabbit hole have I fallen down??

Oh. Sorry.
 Are there like, a lot of people who like, swear  a lot?
Naked, under this sign? In front of the hotel? 

You know, I swear quite a lot. I know, I know, potty mouths are not that nice, and women of a certain age definitely shouldn't let loose with the 'F' bomb!
Sorry! Sorry!
But I do, on occaision, swear when I'm pissed off about something! 

This sign, more than the no gun sign, scared me into
re-thinking the day's plans...

Ticks have not yet made their way north to our region of eastern Ontario in any significant numbers. But I do know that Lyme's Disease is terrible..and I don't want to turn a leisurely stroll through the woods into a catastrophic event...like getting shot by a crazy guy with a gun
who didn't read the first sign!
Oh. Sorry.
Getting a little carried away here! As a matter of fact, if I had a horse, I would get carried away from the tick zone, and I'd park myself here...

This is what I love, love, LOVE about travelling in general and the States in particular! It's the complete about-turn, give your head a shake, parallel universe that exists! Just when I thought it was too dangerous to go outside, or for a simple little walk, I find that I can not only do both, but I can have a tin bucket to give ol' Stewball a few oats and a drinka water!
Just like back home. Shucks.
Lose the car altogether and just hit the road.

Okie dokie then.
Happy trails to you.
And you, and you and you and you!


Wolynski said...

Wilno is the capital of Lithuania, which used to be part of Poland - too complicated. So, yeah, with a name like that it has to be Polish... or Lithuanian.

Very funny signs. This gun thing will eventually bite Americans in the ass. The more jobs you outsource, the more people you fire - Americans are already pissed off. Angry people with guns?

Dave Lewis said...

Yep...living down here is VERY confusing. By the way, I don't have a gun...or a buggy, I generally keep my clothes on(because Doodles says I have to), but I have to say I'm sorry because I do swear on occasion.
Okay...to long of a comment? I'm sorry.

(My word verification was "billych", is that a Canadian curse word?)

Susan said...

"billych' is what Billy does when he wants to scratch... I thought everyone knew that!

Carolyn said...

Great post Susan, I remember when I was in Alaska and went into a bar and the sign at the door said "leave your guns at the door" and there on hooks at the door where a dozen loaded holsters...I was dumb struck!

My cell was actually quite comfortable in its sense of security and coziness...I was surprised but then I didn't HAVE to be there!

Have a great day and thanks for stopping by.

The Early Birder said...

Well Carol this certainly put a smile on my face. Thanks for sharing 'the other world'! FAB.

robin andrea said...

No cursing? How would I be able to complete a whole sentence? Great signs!